One Small Thing

It only takes one small thing in a person's life to turn things around. If someone has not been feeling like themselves for years, or have been slightly or severely depressed over a certain issue, the smallest gesture can awaken their spirits once again and they can continue what they love to do, but what they want to do has been put on the back burner because they are so emotionally involved in what ever it is to causing them to feel down. My sister wasn't having the greatest day ever the other day. I actually stayed home that day from school because I didn't get a good night rest and I was tired from the night before. So I thought I would try to pick her spirits up by doing the smallest gesture. While she was laying in bed waiting for work to come to the start of just another day, I was down in the kitchen doing what I do best...cooking. I was going to make her a toasted cheese sandwich, but my toasted cheese sandwiches are usually the best I ever eat...although sometimes I do burn them, and I did this time as well, it's not about the taste. Now this isn't to say I made a horribly tasting sandwich and gave it to my sister. I had American cheese, turkey breast seasoned, with a couple lettuce leafs on mayo, while the bread was cooked over butter to give it more of a punch...sounds great doesn't it? When I was done I put the sandwich on the plate and threw some cheetos on it, and walked up the stairs to my sister's room and gave it to her and talked to her. She was so thankful that my mom went to me and said that she hasn't stopped talking about it and she's been a lot more happier lately...that was a week ago. It's amazing how the smallest act can make us feel better...but what about dieing for someone? Someone taking their life for us? That's a huge thing to do, and isn't a blip on the radar. If someone jumped infront of me to take a bullet and died for it, my whole life would revolve around that love that that person showed for me. I've seen people tell stories of that and live their life around that fact, yet only go to church on Christmas or Easter. So how can someone worship a man who took a bullet for them, but when Jesus died on the cross to save all of us from ourselves...we can't have our daily life revolve around him? This isn't to put the man who jumped infront of a bullet to save his friend down, no that's showing a lot of love for that person...but it's the living their life around that. Naming their kid, telling people all day about that. How about the next time someone says, "What's the greatest thing to ever have happened to you." Instead of saying, Oh my parents' bought me a car, say, "My best friend layed His life down on the cross. Was beaten violenty before that, and was then nailed to that cross. He wore a hat of thorns, which is now his trademark, and yelled out, 'Father forgive them'. That's not only the greatest thing to happen to me, that's the greatest thing to happen to you and everyone else in this room. When you say that, look at the reaction of everyones face...you'll be astonished on what you see.

Scenery Change Please

Sometimes while I'm watching T.V at home I see during the commericals the Southwest Airlines of how they're asking "Want to get away?". Well that is how I've been feeling for a while. Recently things have just gone south, and not just in my personal life. People have been turning bitter and making sure they get what they need before everyone else get's their share. People are starting to act differently, and say things they shouldn't say in certain places. While I know I am not much better then they are, I know to respect others in certain situations and know when to close my mouth. But while all this is going south I feel like I am the only color image in the black and white background. And I'm not going to lie, I feel alone and sad. I just want to pack up all my stuff and just leave this town, this city, and this state and start over again. A fresh new slate. Maybe California were it's always sunny, bright, and the smog might get to you but it's different right? What about Flordia? Sure there are a bunch of old people, but beaches and all those waffle houses would be nice. Find new friends there, go to a new church, go to a new school. That would be awsome...but heres the kicker. If I leave the place I am having issues with now, nothing is served. Things just will continue to get worst until we self-destruct on each other. If I go to a place to find a Jesus that is more clear than what it is here then I am not doing God's will at all. Infact I am only the cause of people not knowing the real God. This is a mission. To recreate a community that once knew Jesus, and now has lost sight of that figure because of other things. Someone has to do their work here and I will surely try to do it. Because that is what God asks of us.

Brewing

Have you ever felt inside that you really wanted to do a certain thing...wether its writing something poetically, playing an instrument, or something that uses creativeness. That's were I am now. For the past maybe two weeks I've had the urge to just blow up and use all this creativeness in writing something, or singing, or writing music. Yet, everytime I try I get nothing. It's not what I am thinking it should be, and I don't feel satisfied. And after reading what I wrote over and over again I realize not only does it not meet my perfection, it's not what it should be. The creativeness is not there and it's forced and then that effects the final product, not making it the best it should be and that is so frustrating. This bubble inside of me is just getting bigger and bigger and no matter what I jab at it or throw at it, it will not pop for me. You can not force this out of me, you just have sit back with the anticipation of how big it might get and what the out come of this pop will be. This can relate to God...but like I just stated you can't pull out creativeness and force it upon a piece of paper, or in this case a text box on my computer monitor. I know it relates to God, but I can't think of it. I'm 100% sure it's right there on my tip of my tounge and I just want to scream it out, but all I can get are gasps of air like a fish on dry land...nothing. And this is so frustrating because any idea I come up with will only work with a giant leap of stretching it. It relates to God because you cannot force God upon your self. You first have to let God come to you before you can fully understand God. Is that a good thought? I don't know about creativeness, but I'll keep going with it and I'll see how it goes. You can not go up to a person who does not believe in God and say, "Believe in God." And they certainly can't respond, "Ok. Done." Because you can't force Love upon someone without them first accepting it. God loves each and everyone one of us, and nothing we do will make Him love us less. For instance as I try to make this relate even more, You can't say God loves me if you can not fully accept and grasp the concept. You are forcing it upon yourself and you're only making it harder. See now this is where I get frustrated. Back to my first idea I came up with a great idea, and I felt like I was going strong, not my best but not horrible. And yet I get to a point were I can not think of anything anymore. And inside I can feel in my chest this whole bubble of creativeness I want to write for God isn't coming out but is only getting tighter and bigger and isn't satisfying. It is to a point, but not fully. And this is where we end up. Maybe one day I'll get this insight again and I'll write a book or something to that nature.

Float to Jesus

When life is going, and we are just sitting back like we are floating on a river. We think that the river will stay the same. Straight, slow, and nothing will change. But thats not the way a river is. We all know it curves, it picks up speed, there are logs and branches in the river, as well as deep parts. But in life, we expect the river to stay the same and to never change. But thats not the way it is and God makes us aware of that. During our lifetime the river changes. Sometimes the currents are fast and rough. Sometimes we have to be careful of the branches and logs. But most of the time its the paddling around the trees and making those corners that get to us. They take us further out of the way we want to go, and as humans we get upset over that. Our river should be straight not bendy like this. Thats how life is. One moment everything is fine, the next we are holding on to dear life, in a panic, rushing around while just trying to survive. And while this is going on we look to other things to help us get by. For example, alcohol abuse, drugs, sex, things we normally wouldn't do if our river was calm and straight. And it's at these times that we cry out for God to help us and make things better, but before he can answer, we already gone. We went to the things that take us away from our river of life. The side items that we know we arent supposed to do but the current drags us into it. No, the current doesnt drag us. We let the current drag us, because our faith is not strong enough. Like Peter and the fishing boat. Jesus is calling us out of current and to come to him, but without having the faith we need to have, we get pulled back in. So while we're in our whirlpool of sin, if you will, God is snapping his fingers saying hey, look this way. I am right here. Get out of there and back into your boat and I'll meet you there. Reach out your hand and I will grab you from that whirpool that Satin has dragged us into, and I will dry you off. Its almost as these things are to remind us we are not immortal or powerful, but without God in our lives, the world would be so painful and so sad that there would be no current in the river for us to travel. There wouldn't even be a stream to God, but rocks that block our way to him. So if your river is ever fast and unsafe, just remember that God is right with you, and he is saying that it will be alright. Trust in me young one, and I will forever guide you to the stream of God.

Prayer of Thanksgiving

"God we come before you, basking in the gifts you have given us. To the moon, the clouds, the sun, the stars and the rain. To every little creature you have made. Jesus, we couldn't ask for more, but yet as we still build our house on the sand, remind us that with you in our lives, a shack to us that was built in your name, is a kingdom to your glory.

Song Analysis

This would be my first blog post...ever, actually thats a lie. I used xanga before but that doesnt count. Basically I thought I would create a blog were I can go and vent my feelings on life. Wether it's about God, good things of course!, or a song I wrote, or complaining about how people walk slowly in the hallways. Either way it's a good thing.

Basically in my 1st hour class we where told to do a song analysis. I was gone that day, but I'm taking it to mean that we are supposed to convey what we think the artist is saying in his words. Pardon the format seeing it's for school.

The song I chose was by Aaron Shust entitled, “Give Me Words to Speak.” I chose this song because of the complexity of the lyrics. They were not written out to flow as most songs. The lyrics where obviously written from mind to the paper instantly, without any editing. In my opinion, these are how the greatest songs are created because it is what you believe in, and it makes for a more meaningful impact when you hear, or play the song.

The first verse is one that entangles the mind in a battle. The first couple of lines put your mind into “imagine mode” as you create an image of what Aaron is trying to portray. You see a young person, lost and confused, and beaten up. “Calloused and bruised. Dazed and confused.” So we have this image in our mind that someone has been hurt pretty bad, and they are trying to get back up on their feet after loosing a fight. They don’t know where to go, or what just happened. Then Aaron throws in a curve ball. He says that even though we are battered, we want something more. Something else is out there that we need to go and take, but it’s not something that we want. Not something that we dream of, but something more than that. Something that no earthly possession can tame our taste for, but we won’t rest until we find what it is we are searching for.

“My spirit is left wanting something more. Than my selfish hopes, and my selfish dreams.” So our image now takes this battered person who doesn’t know what they are doing, and turns them into someone who has been leading a life full of everything anyone could ever want, but yet yearns for something more. Their spirit and life has not had enough to taste, and they need to keep searching for something you can’t buy. Now that we have this image in our mind Aaron continues the verse by connecting the first couple lines to these words: “I’m lying with my face down on the floor. Crying out for more, and crying out for more.” So if we go back to our first image, someone who is lost and doesn’t have his head on right, battered, and beaten. Now we see him with his knees on the floor, and his face looking down in shame crying out for something to fill his spirit. Something that will bring true happiness to him that is not of material wealth. Something or someone?

This leads into the chorus, in my opinion these words make the song what it is. It says that we can’t think of anything to say. We don’t know what to do, what to say, what to give, we are still in that first image that we are still confused. We ask for God to give us something to say, or anything at all. Yet we will never rest until we know what to say, until we know what the right thing was. The spirit will never sleep if someone is not truly happy, or if they have not been given the gift of knowing God. Then Aaron nails it right on the head by saying “But I know that I owe you my life.” This blows my mind because as Aaron speaks these words, he knows that even though he’s been touring the country, and the world, that everything he does is still not good enough for Him. He still owes God his life for what we have received in return. “So give me words to speak. Don’t let my spirit sleep. Cause I can’t think of anything worth saying, but I know that I owe you my life. So give me words to speak, don’t let my spirit sleep.”
This leads us back into the verse. The second verse is just reinforcing the chorus. No matter what day it is, no matter what the weather is, no matter if the sun is up or if the sun is down, we still don’t know what to say. But we will wait for something, a sign, a hint, basically anything that will help guide us to the right direction. And yet a lot of times we are tempted by something else. Someone else’s voice is leading us away, and that is not the direction we want to go to. So as we stand there and wait patiently we ask for the words that we hear to only be from God’s voice. Let them be his words, let it be his voice, and let it be his way. “Every night, every day. I find that I have nothing I can say. So I stand here in silence. Awaiting your guidance. I’m wanting only your voice to be heard. Let them be your words, let them be your words.” This ends the second verse and leads into the chorus again, and we all know a song isn’t a song without a tag or bridge.

So now our image is this man. Bruised from the warpath of life, broken from the fights on the way, but yet he has everything anyone could ever want. A house, lots of money, cars, and anything his credit card will allow him to buy. Yet his spirit is not filled, and he won’t rest until he hears the words of where to go because he is still lost and confused and needs someone. He’s been living his whole life without having his life completely filled. He hasn’t seen it before because he was blinded, but he has awakened to see a void. Not only that, but he is now seeing all these lies that he has been living his life by these broken promises, broken hopes, and false gods. He doesn’t understand all this stuff that’s been going on. “I just don’t understand. This life that I’ve been living, I just don’t understand. I just don’t understand. I just don’t understand, these lies I’ve been believing, I just don’t understand. I just don’t understand.
This leads back into the chorus for a repeat to the finale. So the story of our image, this man, we have seen him cry, been beaten, confused, and has been hurt by not having something he’s wanted his whole life. Now at the end of the song, he has opened his eyes and he is now in the right direction. He is asking for God to give him words to speak, because he knows he owes his life.